A Different Kind of Dating


Image from 21centuryrelationships.blogspot.com

Although romance and dating are played up in the media surrounding our generation, the reality of it all is a little less exciting and maybe a little more technical.

Throughout high school, I craved male attention. Spurred on by the trashy teen novels I hid under my pillow and the absurd amount of Gossip Girl I watched, I was sure that romance was the key. I didn’t understand why boys didn’t ask girls out on dates like in the movies. I also didn’t quite ever comprehend the whole “talking” phase couples had to go through before ever actually going on a real date. The shows and books I followed along with the stories and hopes my parents racked my brain with didn’t quite match up to reality. Was it just me? Or was romance and dating taking a new direction?

Now that I’m in college with a few romantic mishaps under my belt, I see that yes, dating has changed over time. With my grandmother repeatedly asking if I’m a lesbian and my friends and I definitely more worried about the possibility of remaining perpetually single, I’ve realized that dating and strong relationships are a rare occurrence nowadays. Not only have I barely had any real experience, but the vast majority of people I know as well. It’s comforting to know that I’m not the only one, but also disturbing. What has dating come to in this day and age?

The bottom line is the new form of communication, a.k.a. the cellphone. Now that texting, iPhones, and non face-to-face communication are big, dates are not. People now depend on their phones to talk to each other. When a guy is interested in a girl, he doesn’t ask her on a date but texts her or even messages her on Facebook. What used to start out with doing actual things together has now turned into carefully calculated texts and messages to each other, trying to keep the conversation as lively as possible with a mere message to express yourself.

Dating is definitely evolving, and quickly. You now have to be a great texter to get a relationship really going. Apparently, face-to-face communication and romantic connection is less our generation’s thing. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but something that could get in the way of strong relationships down the road. In the mean time, individuals of our generation are learning to be more independent, and occasionally texting a special someone.

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Comments

  1. Elise you are so true!
    The spontaneity of relationships totally disappears behind calculated “online” seduction.
    I love you because you said that.
    And I’m trying to perpetuate this “online” luvin because I have no choice 😉
    That’s how thing works now. Right?

    • Elise Brunsvold says:

      Haha, thank you so much for the comment! I completely agree with you on all accounts. It’s hard to come to terms with but I guess it’s just the way it is.

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