Co-Existence: Friendships and Relationships


While scrolling through my Facebook news feed, I saw a status from a girl I knew who said she didn’t allow her boyfriend to have a girl best friend. I thought this was a very interesting view. It took me back to the age-old question: Can men and women truly be friends?

Within the last few years, in which I have actually paid attention to relationships, I have noticed a lot of the insecurities and trust issues that some people have. A tricky area of relationships seems to be the balance between friends and your significant other. Your friends usually have been around much longer than the person your involved with. So, they feel a sense of some might say claim, but I’ll say priority. They were there to pick you up at your lowest point. A very solid bond has been established with these very people. The bond becomes so strong you become best friends, a second family even. Things change however when you add girlfriends and boyfriends into the equation.

Truthfully, it is completely irrational to think that things will continue to stay as normal as they were before. However, your friends shouldn’t be removed from your life just because you may have “fallen in love.” I find that in this stage of love things can begin to sometimes take a turn for the worst. You think you’re going to just hang out your friend. But no, instead everywhere they go their significant other isn’t too far in tow. From a friend’s perspective, if I don’t go on dates with you or lay in bed for a threesome, I’m confused at where a line can be drawn; a line that would enable both sides to get their own personal time.

I don’t think it’s necessary to ban your significant other from having close friends of the opposite sex. I believe it should all come down to trust. So, if you can’t simply just trust the person, then why are you with them? As the day draw nearer for me to head back to college for my sophomore year, I dread the amount of balance that will have to come. Since most of my close friends are now in relationships, causing me to live in a place I call “Fifth Wheel City”. By the end of the year I hope to finally figure out how to make relationships and friendship co-exist in a happy world. All without the terrible implementing of the “Odd Wheel” or the “Odd Man Odd” syndrome.

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